Juno.

I just watch JUNO for the 4th time.

A not so Christmas classic,

but easily one of the most simple and real movie out there.

Oh, and the sound track is really really good.

Lyrics | Barry Louis Polisar - All I Want Is You lyrics

I just saw...

my Bally bag flew out of my reach.

Good bye.

Yet again...

I'm underpaid for 4 months of hard work.

Sibeh sianz.

I wanna..

put down everything and travel.

To somewhere i can relax and schedule everything to my timing.

No kids.

No compromises of waiting time.

Just pure relaxation.

Soon...Hopefully.

I won't be travelling this year end.

Too much factors are holding me back.

No, I dun wan to face or go through the process of being scrutinise on how i should behave.

No, i dun wan to judge on how I reason myself.

And yes, that's why i'm choosing to leave.

It's been a tough year for me,

and i don't see it getting any better.

I get frustrated very easily.

And i simply lost interest in daily matters.

A few have been saying its my mindset,

and once i get over it, things will get better.

How would it be better when I'm in the source of everything,

every single day?

Maybe it's time i see a shrink.

I need...

freelance that actually pays...

I'm very broke.

Sianz....

Sometimes...

Sometimes,

You need to be apart from people you love,

But that doesn't means you love them any less,

Sometimes,

It even makes you love them more.

Let me go.

I just wanna be...

happy.

Don't care about the pain in front of me.

I just wanna be

Happy.

Max is back...

and so is my haircut!

Whoohoo!!

SHORT SHORT AH!

Sean say I look like Ah Beng.

IT Ah Beng...sell handphones in Sim Lim type. Bloody funny!

Trying very hard...

I am.

Trust me i am.

Sometimes it's beyond any logical decisions to resolve the problem.

It takes time.

A long long time.

Only a few of you know. And I grateful. Really.

You have no idea what this meant to me.

I'm sorry if I created any burden to any of you, hopefully, everything will just go away.

Whether death or pure avoidance, I just hope it goes away.

Hopefully...

By the next pay increment,

I'll have enough income to move out of the house.

7 months and 5 days.

I'm through.

I can only trust...

max.....

Quickly come back and help me...

My Love.

Love.

"I have no problem with fat people.

...I have problem with fat and ugly people."

Wow. I was totally threw back to the ultimate pit of my stomach.

It hurts quite bad.

Seriously.

Fat and Ugly.

Wow.

Swollen Eye and the Photoshoot.

Been preparing for the photoshoot this morning for days.

From wardrobe

to poses

to lightings

to expression

to mood.

And guess wat ruin it?

My swollen eye!

No I did not peep at anyone....It's more like a sudden puffed up eye.

No painful, only abit itchy.

And worst..i had to face the model and photographer, while directing them with my mutated eye. Sibeh malu.

Anyway, all went well. Manage to get all 22 poses that i need, although overrun by 30mins...

Hopefully no extra cost incurred.

Cheers!

(From Left: Adrian the Model, Ryan the Hiao Makeup Artist, Carmen the Boss, Me the Swollen Eye)

20.09.2009

Marks the 7th year zubees been in my life.

I love her to death, and she's been my greatest joy every single day.

Happy Birthday my dearest zus!!

Hope you enjoy your favorite vanilla ice-cream with apple bits today!

Not forgetting the wings and the ultra relaxing bath scrub as part of your bday package.

* while typing this post, she's already snoring on my bed...

On a side note, 

Buttercake & Cream(cafe) in Sunset way, Clementi, really really serves good dessert and cakes.

If you love coffee like I do, pls head down for their double shot espresso Affrogatto. I think a mile better than TCC's. Their desserts are equally superb too. Had Tiramisu, Vanilla Pina Cotta, Apple Crumble, Banana Madness, Double scoop ice cream, and Affrogatto. YES. All in one seating. Really good. A great place to chill out.

How to beef up a content.

Just repeat whatever you type 2 times, and you content will seems much more fuller.

Just repeat whatever you type 2 times, and you content will seems much more fuller.

And if you should, break into nice layout format.

And if you should, break into nice layout format.

Geddit?

Don't attempt to...

play with fire when u know it burns.

When u get burnt,
don't start blaming on the fire for being nasty and hurtful.

U knew about the obvious consequences,
u knew about the losing risk,
and you knew about the hateful conclusion.

Why even bother to put it out now?

Just let it burn will you?

And if i were you...i will let the fire put out itself,
and in the meantime, JUST SHUT UP.
If you must, sew it up.

*ps. not an angsty emo post. Not worth to bring it up over dinner conversation. If u wan to noe more. Ask me.

RED.

Weirdly addictive.



Enjoy.

威武.

It's time for WONFU again!!

I can't wait for their new album at the end of the year. 

Hear a few tune and it's gona be very high!!

Amazed.

Do you still do things that amazed not only others, but yourself too??

I just did.

I WATCHED HANNAH MONTANA THE MOVIE.

WOAH. 

i feel like primary 4 right now. HANNAH!!!!!!!!!!

W.A.R - Wars Are Ruthless

Did you ever had a childish verbal fight with ur loves one?

Where you said the rudest,

shamelessly,

and horrid things to him/her.

And after a cold war, you patched up, and life picks up again, and you start living again?

Well i just one with her.

Multiply freaking 10 million childishness, most nonsensical, utterly no-brainer fight ever.

I think i lost her.

So for now, i'm freaking gona get on with my life cos she leave me with no choice.

Dun piss me off, cos nothing can penetrate this icy exterior.

Leave a comment to support my war. 

Hugs and relax comment not appreciated. 

*ps. Not family members nor lili

ok.

Laughter.

It's been a looong while since i laugh and behave like a kid.

I just did and it feels really good.

For mere few hours, I really felt the bliss of having so much fun and excitement.

I'm thankful.

Please help me.

I have lost all my 10yrs msn contacts...

I amazed myself with my stupidity. 

So please update or add me at mike_max@live.com

Also...help me pass around mutual friends.

namely, Polys friends, ex-colleagues and family.

thanks all.

Kaboom!

Third Tier Club

Was chatting with one fellow member on the newly form Third Tier Club, and it's funny how we both agree so much on how dispensable we are!!

We are however indispensable to each other ( i think so hor goose..).

So 3 cheers to the club!
Hur hur hur.

At times like these...

I just want to escape from everything.

No. I not emo.

It's weird to admit and even recognise that, i might be suffering from mild depression.

I dun think friends can help me anymore, cos I'm really numb from hearing "Quit your job lah.." or " Take it easy..Dont work too hard." 

I always ponder to myself...If i ever quit my job. How am i going to support myself? 

I'm going for my 8th and 9th op in Dec. Yes. 

It's been a hell journey for me.

I'm really sick of thinking about how I'm able to secure my current job with my condition.

And I'm more sick to explain what is goin on with my life.

In conclusion, I'm not having any suicide thoughts yet, although i do think death is less painful for now.

I'm just feeling that, nothing is working for me, and no matter how hard i fight, I end up losing more than before.

I hope i will get through this phrase soon, cos I dunno how much i can hold it any longer.

I'm not insignificant.

Don't vent your anger on me because you lack of
• Morale

• Self esteem

• Confidence

• Judgement 

Get a grip of yourself before you even question about my stands.

I'm seriously sick of all these pure nonsense.

Don't diss me off because you freaking think you are more superior than me.

I'm not retaliating because I'm showing you the last pinch of respect I can find in myself.

Seriously, you are not that worthy. Don't push it too far.

I'm trying to get peace within myself. 

Escaping all kind of unnecessary stress that could possibly trigger my constant headache and tolerance level.

I haven been talking at home for 4 months.

I haven been sitting in the living room for 4 months.

I haven even been eating at the dining table for 4 months.

Am I feeling ok?

Of cos not.

Do i feel good about all the silence?

Yes, cause it took all the stress away. Not having to talk keeps my head more leveled.

Does anyone cared?

Nope.

Cos I'm insignificant.

That's who I am.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Been watching youtube nowadays since i cant catch Ellen on daily basis.

I laughed so hard i almost peed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkevNuXLRKE

今天只做一件事.

陈奕迅.

http://wap.opda.com.cn/bbs/upload3/music/20090324/04.mp3?jdfwkey=pcrej

我今年25岁。

又36个月。

我不是28岁！

是 25岁and 36months.

Please get this clear hor.

Well, my birthday celebration this year is pretty mellow.

It started on Friday, where company had the traditional Not-Very-Subtle-Old'fashion-Surprise.

Sing song, cut cake and engaged in some seriously weird topic.

Thanks guys for the Zara Jacket, It's really cool.

Second - celebration was with Brother and family.

We went Suntec and dine at MOF. Pretty decent Japanese food i must say.

I very much like the ice cream dessert that they served. Esp the mango ones.

Thanks gor, angeline, silas and anna for the Buzz Lightyear Pins and my Black Cup.

Third -  lunch was dine together with my buddy, tanny.

We had English high tea again at Goodwood Park.

It was a super nuah afternoon and we both got really 'tieooor' with all the savory and sweet pastries. Really leh. 

Thanks bud for the highly useful pantone chart. Although that means i got to work more. HA!!

Fourth - Dinner with Cousins and Aunt.

We had zi char at Jalan Malu Malu. Had quite a spread. With crabs, prawns, vege, hor fun....etc.

Thanks guys for the dinner!

More will follow i think...

Lili sms when the clock strike 12.

"3...2...1... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TEDDY........etc etc (lazy to type) "

and attached with a cake pic

Wedding cake somemore! Pengz!!

HAhahah

Anyway

No matter how big or small the celebration,

Regardless how expensive or cheap the gift is,

And screw the old the saying "It's the thoughts that counts",

It's feels pretty damn good to be remembered and worth the time to be spend with.

Thanks Sis, Marc, Ryan and Phoebe for sending a card from aust~

*vera called and say alot of weird things like baby and bugis street.

She's have a very bad sore throat, and she sound like Kermit the Frog crossed breed with Witch. Badass!

Who will live on...

Izzie or George?

And have you tell someone you care "I love you" before it's too late?

Cause this is it...it might all be gone tmr...

.

Cars.

How long do you reckon, say a front and back view of 2 cars photoshoot would take?

6hrs?

12hrs?

.

.

.

.

.

.

It's 17hrs.

Wah lau.

This is the first time I art direct a car photoshoot, and I'm totally shack out.

All the research, layout and angles, finally done and over with.

Now all i have to do is wait for the pictures before i can start on the FA.

Art directing cars are worst than art directing models.

At least I can control the model face and angle, even for the mommies i did previously.

But for car....simply expressionless, yet, got to make it look fierce, sleek and aggressive.

Behind the scene

Ok time to sleep.

扫墓。

Absolute

Thankful.

To my 2 buddies.

Thank you Tanny.

For always being there for me, even with all your problems. You are always the first person I confide to and to look for solutions for all my problems. 

Thank you Yean.

For always keeping me in your thoughts and be there when i need to unwind. (Although usually very very very very late.)

I am really touch by your post.

Thanks for just being there.

---------------------------------

I haven't been talking to anyone for the past 2 weeks.

Not to my parents, not to family.

I'm not even talking much to myself either.

I just shut myself away recently.

I dunno what happen also, but i just feel very bottled up.

No, i'm not emo.

I think it's the pills.

ahh heck.

All i do now is sms and msn to her.

At least she is making me happy for now.

Adios pple.

Need to find.

I'm an official pills popper.

I need nice, really nice pills case to house all my pills.

If anyone sees a really nice designer looking one, pls buzz me.

Eat pills also must got style maaaa...

Did you?

Did you ask me How's my work today?

Did you ask me if i'm still having headache?

Did you ask me if I'm feeling tired from all stress i'm facing?

No.

Cause you never attempt to.

How would you even know?

Why I couldn't try to start the topic?

Because you only see them and the TV.

Why even bother.

Did I tell you that all i need is a good night sleep from all the pills i'm taking?

Heck no.

Did i mention that all i need is a peace of mind?

Heck no.

Why?

Didn't you?

Tired.

I really am.

I'm tired of being judged for voicing out at home.

I'm tried of being the one that have to provide everything at home, and all I get is unreasonable attitude.

I'm tired of keeping all my problems to myself, so as not to worried any of them.

But they are not seeing it.

I'm tired of not getting any rest when i gets home from work.

I'm tired of listening to Taiwan news on the TV.

I'm tired of being at home.

I'm tired of trying so hard to be a good man.

I'm tired of living my life.

I'm tired of being tired.

Please let me rest.

Just for once.

See me as a family.

见底了。

近来身体状况非常不佳。

1） 去年10月的手术， 不顺利。有可能会再动刀。

2）头。头真的很痛。痛到很想死。 做了几个身体检查，脑部扫描。 要再等报告出来才知道原因。But。。。 心也很痛。应为看医生是(*&($*$(*^%#67 的贵！！ 全部是给cash. Cannot Claim.

So, if there's any freelance, please let me know.

AHhah.

Mandy> GOT MA?? Ask Janice leh...........

回来了。

哇。 很久没po了。

有好多东西要update.

*impromptu reaction while typing and watching American Idol. Paula Abdul really sucks.

Firstly, 旺福终于来开唱！

High 到一个离奇的境界。

一直都很喜欢他们的歌，听了肯定疯癫乱跳， 失魂鬼叫。

真的。

应为我隔天失声。

哇哈哈！

Secondly, 

刚刚出席了好友的婚礼。

哦。。 了不起么。

当然！ 

达飞机到 Jakarta leh.

First time fly all the way to another country just to attend a wedding.

给足了面子。

Vera and Tri, Congrats!!

在印尼，

碰上了许多朋友，感觉很棒。

有些还是听闻了许久， 终于见面。

Dedi, Hendut and mei's family.

非常可爱的一群疯子。

哈哈。

肯定的是， 我爱上了印尼人的热情。

也已答应mei's father, Papa Ujang, 明年在去他家玩！

听mei 说， 新家是大到不行。

还蛮期待的。

－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－

最后， 我好像恋上了她。

and confirm not meimei hor.

雕。

我爱台湾。

真的。

第五次，就献给了台湾师傅，少白。

跟我同龄的他，以经刺了10年。

这家伙的功夫了得，在 1hr 40min 左右，就刺完。

快。

精。

细。

完美。